My First Studio!

So today was my first chance directing in studio. I'm lucky enough to be apart of a student television station that still has a fully equipped studio (albeit, not a well-equipped one, but it's quite snazzy and professional looking nonetheless). I have to admit, I was really freaked out about the prospect of directing, originally. I don't know, there are so many little details, so many things to remember. And my inner perfectionist seemed very bent on psyching me out. Certainly I would be DESTINED to fail, and it would be the absolute END OF THE WORLD when I did.

Since coming to Scotland, I've really tried to shut that voice up. Too often, I feel, it's that fear of the reprecussions of not doing something well that keeps me from even bothering to try. But I can't think like that. It doesn't do me any good, and only keeps me from doing the things I want. And I think it leads to me perpetually undervaluing myself. Because for all the planning and panicking, my studio session actually went quite well. My links were filmed without too much of a hitch (apart from a considerable amount of trouble created by getting a blue background) and I'm psyched to get under way with editing and reviewing the footage (we'll see how keen I am on all that in a week).

Once I got started in the director's chair, there wasn't room for the perfectionist in my brain. I was too busy actually getting the work done. Sure, I had to refer to my far-more-experienced Assistant Directors on things like figuring out camera angles and how to get the background less wrinkly with the lights, but that's not so bad. Asking questions satiates the voice that wants it all to come out well, and when I get straight forward answers, I feel like I know what I'm doing. And that's when it all gets a little less scary.

(Also, there's something rather satisfying about sitting up in a gallery and telling people what to do...just saying. :-)).